By lmolyneux, on April 30th, 2012 I prepared this letter to accompany a friend’s application to graduate school. Let me know what you think. Not sure whether I should send this or some variation of this letter I wrote earlier for another occasion.
Dear _____________________________,
I consider it an honor to have been selected from an exclusive pool of potential recommenders that included several heads of state to write this letter expressing what is likely already obvious: Matthew J. XXXXX, Esq., will be the finest student your school has ever admitted.
His illustrious name and glimmering resume nearly speak for themselves; however, I will take this opportunity to expound on his unending greatness. Calling him and his work “brilliant” would be to understate the luminescence that from him bursts without restraint. He is not merely a beacon to the world but also the high point upon which it sets. Indeed, he magnifies himself, each glorious act inexplicably greater than the one preceeding it.
The most permanent and serious harm you could ever do to your fine institution would be to overlook Mr. XXXXX’s application, forfeiting the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to bask in his unmatched radiance, revel in his boundless genius. Please do not hesitate to contact me if you wish to discuss his qualifications further.
Yours in humble sincerity,
Logan K. Molyneux
By lmolyneux, on March 31st, 2012 This year I have submitted my best bracket ever. You can see it below, but I have summarized the highlights for you here:
Round 1 (which I refuse to call Round 2 even though it occurs after the new “first four” games) — Called the VCU upset, of course, because it’s VCU and there’s always some good 12-over-5 upsets. Also called Xavier but missed the rest of the upsets. Overall, 21/32 games picked correctly.
Round 2 (which the NCAA now absurdly calls Round 3) — Called the Cincy win and missed much else. Overall 11/16.
Sweet Sixteen — Here’s where it gets good. Besides the West (Louisville and Florida), which I think nobody got right, I was all over this round. I missed the Syracuse game though, because I picked them to lose after I read that their big man got injured. Overall 5/8.
Elite Eight — Again, the west kills me (who knew Mizzou would choke?), but I called KU over UNC and picked OSU to win. Kentucky is an obvious choice. Overall 3/4.
Final Four — Kansas and Kentucky, boom. Overall 2/2.
So you get a lot of points if you pick these games correctly this far down the line. I rank 74,148th on ESPN’s Tourney Challenge, out of who knows how many, but they usually get a few million brackets. In the final round I have Kentucky over Kansas, which appears to be all but a foregone conclusion now.
Submitting a bracket is a great thing, so long as you do only one. For example, in tonight’s KU-OSU game, two teams I care nothing about (in fact I always have some animosity for “establishment” teams — I mean, how hard is it to be an Ohio State fan, really?), I was rooting hard for KU because my bracket told me I should. So I make my picks and then cheer for the teams I picked as if there’s no other way the game could possibly turn out.
See my full bracket here: Logan’s Luscious Picks
UPDATE 4/3/2012: Picked the champ correctly too. First time I can remember doing that.
By lmolyneux, on March 28th, 2012 FUNNYMAN
ACT I
Logan sits in a computer lab, waiting for the last few students to finish their assignments. The sound of clacking keyboards fills the air as they rush to finish before another class comes in to use the lab. The hallway outside the lab is empty, except for the tall, googly-eyed guy with long, scraggly hair.
Funnyman enters the lab.
FUNNYMAN: (impatiently, as if the lab might start at any moment) Um, we have a lab in here at 3.
A pause, while Logan considers who else Funnyman might be referring to when he says “we.” Logan checks the clock, and although it is indeed 3 p.m., the next lab shows no signs of bgeinning soon.
LOGAN: Yep. (goes back to grading a student’s work)
Funnyman stalls, then sets his books down and exits the lab while he waits for the rest of his class to arrive.
Curtain.
By lmolyneux, on March 12th, 2012 I have been very busy. I’m sure you understand.
But to give you an idea of just what I have been up to, check out this gallery. I replaced my car stereo and speakers myself, another notch in my DIY belt. The wife got a minivan and I inherited what used to be our only family car, so I had to make it mine.
It was pretty hard getting the dashboard face plate to come off, and there are now a couple of marks in it where I crunched it a little while prying it up. Probably not noticeable unless I pointed them out to you. Another hard part was wiring the two harnesses together. You can see in the first picture I had to match and clamp about a dozen wires to get the new stereo to use the factory wiring. But I only had to call for help twice. Good thing Crutchfield tech support is there. Once I got the wiring figured out and the dash trim off, putting it together was pretty easy, you just slide it in the big hole. The stereo came with a black trim ring around the faceplate, but it was too wide to fit in the hole in the dash trim, but they knew that already, because the adapter they sent with the stereo had a narrower one. At first I was like, why won’t the dash go (SHOVE) … back (PUSH) … on (GRUNT), and then I noticed it was hitting the edge of the stereo faceplate. A little switcheroo and I was good to go.
Getting the speakers in took much longer, mostly because of all the tiny screws. About a dozen tiny screws to get the door panel off, four screws to get the old speaker out, four tiny bolts and four microscopic nuts and washers to attach the new speaker to the adapter plate, then four screws to attach the plate to the door. And of course another dozen screws to get the door panel back on. In the rear, I had to take apart the sides of the seat to be able to undo the rear panel, and the way it’s situated underneath the slope of the hatch means it’s almost impossible to get the inside speaker screws out. (See the eighth photo.) No way I could fit a screwdriver in there, even a short one. So I have a magnetic screwdriver with switchable tips, and I ended up putting one of those tips into the screw and using a pair of pliers sideways to turn it a quarter turn at a time. Ugh. Because the speakers face upward, they could get dust or whatever falling in them, and the new speaks didn’t come with any protection. The factory speakers had a nice mesh held in place by a ring of paperboard, so I cut that off and slid it over the new speakers, perfect fit.
That’s probably four hours too many spent on my car audio. But much improved sound and volume in my car. Next time I get a bonus, it’ll be a subwoofer, because it makes a huge difference.
By lmolyneux, on December 5th, 2011 WooooooooOOOOOOOooooo, it sure has been a while. No promises about future blogging, but this post promises to be a winner. Mostly because the people I saw on the bus today were. Winners, that is.
On the bus with me today:
- This guy who fell asleep mid-text. I saw him slumped over like this and his eyes were closed and he was doing the heavy breathing. His hand was motionless, suspended about an inch from his screen, pointing at it as if he were still typing. I know he was texting because I saw “Hey man,” and a few other words on the screen. A few moments after I snapped this pic he woke up and finished his message.
- A candidate for Craziest Bus Guy of the semester got on downtown as I was headed to the Statesman to take an editing test. He was wearing cloth sneakers, polka-dot leggings, denim shorts, and some sort of jacket that I didn’t notice because of his incredibly gaudy pink sunglasses. (It is cloudy today and no brighter than your average lobby.) They had long corners that extended out to the sides like the ’50s glasses used to, but longer. Top it all off with a partial beard and some long scraggly hair down to his shoulders. He and his girl were talking about how they were headed to get him a phone because you have to have a phone if you want a job. He did not give any evidence or reasoning behind this assertion; rather, he backed it up with a song, which I have transcribed for you.
That is what he actually sang, perhaps in a different key, but definitely in a high, whiney falsetto. I expect one of you to record a remix of it for YouTube.
By bmolyneux, on November 17th, 2011 …..apparently the frequency of blog posts is inversely proportional to stress level.
Thanks, PhD fairy.
Jerk.
By lmolyneux, on November 4th, 2011 Lest you think I do nothing but ride the bus all over the place (Though I sort of wish that could be a job. If I were a creative writer for a living I would buy a bus pass and do all my thinking on the bus. There’s something about the stop and go bumpiness or the changing scenery of a bus ride that gets my mind in motion, too.), here is a list of the things I have done . . . → Read More: I do other things too, you know
By lmolyneux, on November 4th, 2011 I forget what I’m supposed to be doing. On the bus with me today:
- Nobody. Is it Saturday and I don’t know it?
- Finally some people start getting on. One guy walks in like he owns the place. He has square features, shaggy hair and a wild goatee. Oh, I get it! I’m an extra in a Geico commercial. (OK, so he is not a caveman. He stood up as the bus got full and a mother with . . . → Read More: On the bus: Whatstoday?
By lmolyneux, on November 2nd, 2011 A short one, but there are two important people I want to tell you about. On the bus with me today:
- Lots of runners, the people who see the bus coming and start sprinting to catch it. One lady is so relieved she made it that she cannot stop sighing, like, “WOOOOOOOooooooo!” Every other breath she is saying to the whole bus, “Did you see that? I RAN, baby, ’cause there was gonna be trouble if I didn’t catch . . . → Read More: On the bus: We are angry and relieved
By lmolyneux, on October 24th, 2011 Well, you can’t write about ALL the crazy people on the bus. Just the ones without red hair or blue hair. Narrows it down. On the bus with me today:
A guy who smells like churros sits down next to me. He is bigger than I am and could beat me up, so I am not making fun of him, just stating that I now detect the aroma of fried dough sprinkled with cinnamon, whereas before I did not. His . . . → Read More: On the bus: Hairsday
|
|
|
![IMG_0406[1]](http://loganmolyneux.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/IMG_04061.jpg "IMG_0406[1]")
Recent comments